A Love of Self…A Selfish Love

Here is what I have been pondering today…Is self love a selfish love? Spent a lot of time today thinking about people I know and have met throughout my life. They all have come in many different packages. I have known some of the most kind, selfless people! I have also known the most selfish people. I tend not to keep super selfish people in my life if I can avoid them. There is a toxicity in some relationships that are not healthy to be a part of. I have had to learn to set boundaries with people like that. Some more extreme than others. I have seen people literally be the hands and feet of Jesus, expecting nothing in return. I have seen the heart of Christ through friends and family members. These people were the ones who rallied around Adam, the kids and I in the midst of his cancer diagnosis, treatment, and after his death. They showed up with food, gift cards, sent cards and hand written letters, made us a beautiful wreath, put together goodie baskets for the kids, lawn care, HVAC repairs, car repairs, home repairs, taking care of the kids, transporting the kids and a huge fund raiser that saved us financially. I know there was so much more, but these were huge blessings to us during this difficult time in our lives. These people served us, loved on us, prayed for us and showed us the beautiful love of Christ in doing so. These same people held me up after we lost Adam. They continued to love us through that storm. They continued to pray and encourage me. These same people prayed for Matt and I to find one another after his divorce. They celebrated our new love and life together with us. They have continued to encourage us, pray for us and held us up as we blended our families and created a new life together. These people were true examples of Jesus in the flesh!

I have also known people who are the total opposite of selfless. I have seen the most selfish acts. I have seen lives and families destroyed through addiction, abuse, abandonment, mental health disorders, extramarital affairs and divorce. I have seen people hurt and broken as a result of these actions done to them during their lives. I have been one of those people hurt by someone very selfish. I have also seen people overcome the destruction and hurt from others and rely on God to heal them in their most broken places. The people who chose themselves constantly over those they love do not know or understand the true love of Christ. They do not understand the sacrifice that Jesus made for us all. He showed us the ultimate act of selfless love. He died so we could live. I know we are all sinners. I know none of us are perfect or without fault. But I know that the blood of Christ covers all of our sins. I know that God sent His one and only son to die on that cross so that we would be forgiven. Do not be selfish in love, but selfless.

I have talked a lot about loving ourself this month. It has been the focus of my blog during all of February. I know not everyone reading this knows our whole story, but it will come over time. I am hoping to remind all of us that loving ourself is also an important aspect of our faith. It is how we refill our tanks so that love can overflow into others. If you keep pouring into a vessel, that vessel will fill and overflow. If you keep pouring out of that vessel it will eventually become empty. What are you doing to keep that vessel full? What are you doing to pour into others? Today my self love task was to spend some time focused on bettering my blog. I want this blog to be a vessel. A vessel of love, hope, faith and encouragement. But more importantly I want this blog to reflect what God wants me to share with each of my readers. I am praying for each of you. I am hoping you feel encouraged, loved and are happy. If you are not happy, I pray that you would seek that joy. Find it and hold onto it. If you cannot find joy, I pray you seek and ask for help. There are so many different resources out there that can help you. God is on your side. He is in your corner. He is holding you up. He loves you regardless of your past. He can overcome every sin and every hurt and heartbreak. He can overcome addiction, abuse, mental health, affairs, and abandonment. Nothing is too big or horrible for God. Trust Him. Let Him love you with an everlasting love.

Jeremiah 31:3 Long ago the Lord said to Israel:"I have loved you, my people, with and everlasting love. With unfailing love I have drawn you to myself."

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By Laurel Austin Henson

Laurel spent 8 months caring for her first husband after being diagnosed with cancer in 2010. He passed away at 33, leaving behind a daughter of 7 and 5 year old twin boys. After sowing millions of tears, Laurel sought out God daily and began to plan for a life of being a single mother, but ready to raise their children in faith, hope and love. God gave her more than she could have ever imagined when she brought Matt into her life, along with his 2 children. He was recently divorced and the providence of God had been leading up to this life for more than 20 years! Now Laurel is reaping joy with Matt and their 5 beautiful children. Thanks be to God for all the beauty created from the ashes of death and divorce.

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